I am writing this as I anxiously await my annual review tomorrow at work. This is where we will go over my goals for the next year, what I am excelling in, what I may need to work better at and then finally discuss a raise if one at all. This year, it has been exceptionally difficult for me to feel fulfilled, satisfied, and appreciated at work. I unfortunately feel a little jaded and half expect to be really disappointed.
That’s the one huge contrast about being at home. I know what my compensation will be everyday. It does not come in a monetary unit but with sticky hands and “I love yous”. There is no extra pay for overtime (4:30 AM wake up call) or hazard pay (third tantrum of the day and its 10:00 AM) however it is predictable and unwavering.
I do like working. It gets me out of the house and around adults however I don’t like the games. At least when I play games with my kids it’s straightforward and there is no hidden agenda. You hide, I will seek. At work it isn’t always that clear. Between a power hungry HR and a supervisor who at times acts very inappropriate, every word and action is scrutinized.
My annual reviews and raise at home don’t go unnoticed to me. I appreciate every moment and milestone my children make and know that I had something to do with that. However, I like getting my paycheck and I do enjoy spending it (even if most of the times its on Thomas Trains and Plum Organics). Compensation is a tricky word that makes a lot of people feel uncomfortable about. For me I think it is general sign of gratitude and respect. I get that from my kids and let’s see what work has to say.